Team PTI’s unrealistic electioneering
Echoes of Naya Pakistan can be heard all around including the airwaves, social media and various tv channels. Kaptaan is doing Jalsaas across Pakistan and team PTI educating voters all over through election offices but unlike Imran Khan’s tall claim of conquering Karachi we see no political activity in the most educated city of Pakistan.
Inspite of fielding candidates from Karachi’s all constituency there is hardly any PTI presence in metropolis – the party workers physically seem inattentive in Urban Sindh.
It is also noted that PTI who twice did huge Jalsas in Karachi is not even considered by the MQM in upcoming elections as they think their faithful and educated voters not going to change their mind for the party who seems least interested in the City.
If Insaafians really planning to create Naya Pakistan on Facebook while MQM, and ANP workers literally losing lives to turn nation into a liberal and progressive Pakistan then it would be a sheer disappointment for their captain in Karachi as election 2013 are not going to be contested virtually.
Let alone camps, Karachites hardly see any banner or posters of PTI in the city which gives an impact that Karachi is least important in the PTI’s priority list and they are mainly focusing on Punjab or precisely PML N’s constituencies to win over as due to Punjab’s population, whoever scores majority will be in a good position to make Government or strong opposition.
The people of Karachi looking for an extremism free nation, the nation which could confront fanatics eye to eye. If PTI is ready to slash extremism its workers must bravely come out on the streets and condemn religious terrorism — else results in metropolis would not be different.
Tehreek-e-Insaaf workers have to work day and night in the right direction to keep party in limelight but if PTI sticks to its Punjab centric strategy and even secures majority, the nation would see no difference between the Nawaz Shareef and Imran Khan but a mere face change. If PTI claims to be a national party it must physically work hard to feel its presence across Pakistan.
It is also believed that PTI workers other than Punjab are more active on social media than to work genuinely on ground. Indeed no one can deny the importance Social Media but its just one factor to influence voters. Educating the voter and establishing presence physically always makes an impact on the people since elections being contested through ballot not Facebook.
What’s the status of PTI in Sindh, Balochistan, Gilgit Baltistan and South Punjab speaks volume about PTI’s strategy towards upcoming elections.
While entering Peshawar a visitor happens to see billboards of Shaukat Khanum Memorial Hospital but apparently PTI has no concrete slogan to sell for KPK. The problem of KPK is not drones but day to day terrorism and poor economical conditions however Imran Khan finds stopping drone the only solution to all problems.
Why Imran Khan doesn’t speak against militancy, economic condition of KPK and over all misery of province is another question needs to be addressed by him.
In Balochistan there is no drone issue it’s purely an issue of Baloch rights likewise PTI has not come up with any solution for Balochistan as well nor do we see party presence there.
In short if Khan is eyeing Punjab to win upcoming elections, he might cut few Punjab seats but end up on being loser.
Its high time for 1st, 2nd and 3rd force to stop focusing one province but work diligently to secure rest of the nations’ seats as well, since Naya Pakistan would be fueled by everyone not one province.
What’s your earthquake story ?
A strong earthquake on Tuesday afternoon measuring magnitude 7.8 on Richter scale jolted Asian and Gulf countries especially Pakistani cities including Karachi, Islamabad, Hyderabad, Lahore and Quetta city.
The epicenter of the huge quake was 86km (53 miles) from Iranian city of Khash, near Pakistan’s border.
In Karachi, the distant quake could be felt throughout the city, as buildings shook for more than 10 seconds and, in some areas, frightened people ran into the streets.
No major injuries were reported in Karachi. Although earthquake tremblers are rare in the metropolis however everybody had his interesting story and logic share.
Most of the people felt tremors during working hours as I felt someone shaking my chair but never paid attention unless the same felt by my colleagues.
One of my cousins didn’t feel anything until the pictures of his family and ancestor wall started swaying. He waited, but none fell. He felt no particular fear, but, the thought came into his head, “Is this the BIG one?”
Another colleague who took off from work was sleeping when her bed shook, she thought of a pet wobbling the bed and slept again but when the tremor lasted for few more seconds she managed to evacuate home.
Some people especially in skyscrapers at I.I Chundrigarh road had no option but to sit and pray as it takes about 10-12 minutes evacuating a good 20th floor building through staircase.
According to a friend, he and his colleagues waited for the CEO to proclaim emergency at workplace and order everybody to move. He narrated his story like this:
In CEO’s room
CEO: Look at this chair
Manager: Yes, I can see.
CEO: Do you see it’s moving.
Manager: Yes sir, it is.
CEO: I think its earthquake. We need to move.
Manager: Sir, I don’t feel anything but yes we should move.
CEO Announces emergency at office and ask already perplexed workers to move out.
A part from those evacuating buildings in deep panic, I must appreciate my nation’s brave tweetterati & facebookers who preferred staying on their chairs and updating status until they were dragged out.
Even the GEO News in the race of “breaking the earthquake story first” kept its shivering newscasters Najia Asher and Mansoor Ali glued during the tremors — just for “BREAKING news”.
The famous Kamran Khan in his program called up a religious scholar to give us an ‘Islamic explanation’ of the earthquake. He explained Karachi as the biggest charity donor of the world thus saved.
Some called it HAARP and as usual blamed ‘Amreeka’ for messing up things and some linked those jolts as Feeler of Almighty’s fury.
A religious group on Facebook spotted accusing sinners for earthquakes as they strike when obscenity prevails and songs are listened.
Interestingly nobody from print or electronic media could come up and educate us on precautionary measures during the earthquake.
As I read somewhere:
- If you’re indoors, stay there. Get under — and hold onto –a desk or table, or stand against an interior wall. Stay clear of exterior walls, glass, heavy furniture, fireplaces and appliances. The kitchen is a particularly dangerous spot. If you’re in an office building, stay away from windows and outside walls and do not use the elevator.
- If you’re outside, get into the open. Stay clear of buildings, power lines or anything else that could fall on you.
So where were you during the jolts?
The Curious case of Na Maloom Afraad
On 8th March 2013, Karachi was again taken over by the unknown people commonly known as “Na Maaloom Afrad”.
These “NMA” got the metropolis shutdown in merely 20 minutes which itself is an ideal lead for Guinness book of world records inspectors as no worldly power could possibly do such a wonder.
The historical and systematic ceasure of one of the world’s largest cities in just 20 minutes flabbergasted Pakistani print, electronic and social media discussing whereabouts of ‘NMA’.
Pakistan’s researchers are associating these NAs with UFOs. According to them Na Maloom Afraad are the brigades unleashed from some Na Maloom powerhouse by some Na Maloom power but so far no one really knows what they are.
Many researchers (called “Namaloomologists”) coming up with their theories about what ‘NMA’ might be, but because no one could examine these NMA in a scientific laboratory or Police Station’s Drawing Room, all of these ideas are only educated guesses.
We can offer a definition of NMA, however, that you may find useful when you study the subject:
Na Maloom Afrad are the reported sighting of mobs Pakistan especially in Karachi whose appearance, trajectory, actions, motions, facial expressions do not have a logical, conventional, or natural explanation, and which cannot be explained, not only by the original witness, but by the Law enforcement agencies, Media or political analysts.
‘NMA’ exist in every city. Most of the NMAs come from different parts of the city to earn but become part of the NA brigade.
The reported actions of Na Maloom Afraad vary dramatically.
NMA can disappear silently for a long time then instantaneously reach certain area– much faster than Chipa Ambulance. They can also stop buses and trucks instantly and perform unbelievable maneuvers, such as single handed torching of buses and trucks, aerial firing, and market closures.
We do not know what powers NMA, or why they have such maneuverability.
Karachites occasionally report feeling pain or receiving injuries during NAs encounter.
At present, the Government of Pakistan does not officially investigate Na Maloom Afraad’s sightings, although there is some evidence suggesting that various intelligence agencies continue to maintain a secret interest in the subject.
However the surprising part of whole NA case is, all political parties of Pakistan univocally condemn these Na Maloom Afraad and often blame their rivals to be their operatives.
Delimitation without census pointless
Much has been said about delimitation of Karachi but the controversy seems to gaining pace. Election commission is all set to conduct house to house voter’s verification and somehow preparing to review the delimitation of constituencies in Karachi as well. Though in his recent statement ECP chairman in his “personal opinion” supported MQM’s stance and said that once delimitation is conducted after the census, then delimiting those constituencies again without holding a new census is “pointless.”
It is pertinent to mention that on Nov 26, a five-member bench of the apex court had observed that constituencies in Karachi should be delimited in a manner that they comprise “mixed population” to avoid political polarization.
And later on Dec 20, The Muttahida Qaumi Movement (MQM) had virtually isolated itself from other political parties when it opposed the issue at a meeting in which Election Commission had convened in this regard. MQM as a result decided to convince Supreme court on legal grounds.
At this point of time the people of Karachi seems confused about Supreme courts decision of delimiting Karachi only as population census are held in different countries of the world before the redrawing of constituencies and then demarcation of constituencies is carried out. On what legal grounds delimitation would take place is still a question to be answered by the Law hawks.
Not to mention that the election commission’s decision to review constituencies of Karachi only and that too without census can open a Pandora box.
As ECP reports for the General Elections 2002 gives province wise break down of complaints. According to the report, total 97 complaints were filed from Balochistan, 238 from Sindh and 165 from Khyberpakhtunkhwa, these statistics roughly indicate that there was nothing extraordinary raised against the ‘delimitation’ of the province.
Also, Pashtuns living in Balochistan have long contended that their number was not accurately recorded in 1998 population census as they had boycotted the census hence they are underrepresented. Likewise Karachi can also demand greater number of seats as a result of mass migration from up country during the recent years.
Karachites also ask whether Election commission would reduce seats from KP, Balochistan and Punjab and allocate those seats to the metropolis since most of the people moved to Karachi from these provinces in recent years.
When would Honorable Supreme Court enforce other parts of judgment where it said that land should be recovered occupied illegally is another question being pondered by the citizens of Karachi, as implementation of this particular judgment would bar illegal occupants living illegally in the outskirts of Karachi as well as on the mountains from manipulating the voting lists, using land illegally, stealing electricity and other resources being utilized without paying taxes.
Contrary to the current situation, just a few years ago the Election commission of Pakistan in its press release on May 23, 2007 had taken a very clear position against delimitation of constituencies in the absence of new population census.
This is the position which Election commission respectfully needs to communicate with the Honorable court as demands for delimitation could also be raised from other cities of Pakistan and it would be irrational to believe that except Karachi rest of the country’s constituencies were perfectly drawn.
In my opinion Karachi should not be given “priority” on any other city of Pakistan. Along with Karachi, delimitation of other cities should also be carried out as per “law” because without a fresh census, the act of delimitation, which in essence is meant to create equality in the constituencies, would be nothing but a futile exercise.
Pakistan’s quest for nothing
Ever noticed that microphone icon on Google search engine? The newer versions of Google Chrome now include an impressive speech recognition engine. You can speak instead of typing into any text box that contains this microphone and the search engine will open up the world of information for you.
This is just a tiny example of innovation which I felt like sharing with readers.
On the other hand Youtube is still banned in Pakistan and God forbid if more mischief is spread by some miscreant even in Congo there is a good chance of blocking whole internet facility in Pakistan as well.
Followed by comparatively peaceful Ashura with “only” two bomb blasts, I got a chance to check news channels hoping to have some good news but what I watched was a young man hanging on the 8th floor of tall Statelife building in Karachi witnessed by hundreds of excited shop keepers and passerby. The whole event had been covered Live by almost all Tv channels.
After about 8 minutes the most awaited moment came and the young boy perceived as a stunt man fell from the building and lost his life.
Scores of people witnessed the ‘event’ on sight but unfortunately nobody attempted to help him. The famous Zainab market shopkeepers could not come up with the idea to pile up clothes and blankets to provide any possible support to the falling guy. Nor any commandos or police were sent to break 9th floor window to pull up the unfortunate boy.
Expecting any support from fire snorkels was indeed out of question since despite keeping all necessary equipment the citizens of metropolitan city should keep their expectations low from Government institutions.
The politicians often call Pakistan a failing state but in reality it has now become a failed state.
I remember the former US intelligence director only threatened to send Pakistan back in Stone Age but we Pakistanis honored his words and did it by ourselves. The country with frequent power cuts, Gas shortages, and unavailability of clean water and with having no implementation rules and regulations is in the state of chaos. It’s now the matter of survival of the fittest. If you are a big shot accompanied by several security guards you are safe else wait to get stuck in a situation.
However the blame cannot only be shifted to the Government since the people of Pakistan are equally contributing their share to destroy this nation. A so called democratic Pakistan holds no civility – violating laws, fighting over petty issues is considered as our pride.
India, Iran, China, Afghanistan, no borders are safe from us. We rather putting our house in order are keener to play the role of custodians of Islam. Be it Palestine, Muslims of Burma, Somalia, Afghanistan or China the people of this unfortunate nation are hell bent on fixing the conditions of Muslims across the world and that too with no genuine contribution towards civilization.
Common characteristics of a failing state include a central government is so weak that it has little practical control over much of its territory; non-provision of public services; widespread corruption and criminality; refugees and involuntary movement of populations, and sharp economic decline. Unfortunately, the land of pure is comprised by all these characteristics thus can safely be included in the index of failed state.
Now what we need to do to fix up this nation is now no more a question to ponder.
The nation where Hindus are forced to bury dead bodies has its own set of rules. In next coming years we not preparing for progressive Pakistan but getting ourselves ready to face the ideal failed nation.
Crossbreed
Call it Crossbreed or Carrier transplantation but the genius has replaced the original Suzuki carry’s drop-side bed with the bigger one originallly installed with Hyundai Muscle trucks.
This picture was taken at Karimabad bridge, Karachi – where the driver transporting motorbikes on the evergreen Suzuki pick up with different yet creative style.
Indeed necessity is the mother of invention and Pakistanis are the masters of workaround.
Faizan -e- Madina’s mission to the moon
Ilyas Qadri has declared its intent to send Madni man to the moon, aiming to become the first Madni Man to reach the lunar surface since the last American mission in 1972.
A Green paper published on Thursday laid out five-year plan for the development of new Faizan e Madina on moon and provided the official confirmation of Ilyas Qadri’s lunar ambitions.
The landing is not expected until at least 2020 but under the Faizan e Madinas green prints “new techno-religious breakthroughs” in human space flight will be achieved by 2016.
Faizan e Madina hopes to complete it first Faizan e Madina station in the same year, a goal encouraged by the successful mission to dock two unmanned Madni Tayyaray in orbit last month.
“Madni people are the same as people around the world,” Ilyas Qadri, an official with Faizan e Madina’s Space Administration, told Tanzeelism
“When looking up at the starry sky, we are full of longing and yearning for the vast universe, we believe moon is also green.”
Two Madni flights are expected in the 2012.
The scale of Faizan e Madina plans come in stark contrast to those of the United States, the first and only nation to reach the moon in 1969.
George W Bush proposed an American return to the moon but the programme was halted by Barack Obama, citing the enormous cost.
No human set foot on the moon since December 1972 when American astronauts landed as part of the Apollo 17 mission.
Although the space programme is being solely run by founder of Ahl e Sunnat Ilyas Qadri, the green paper insists the sect has no ambitions for weapons in space but only Halwa.
“Madni people always adhere to the use of Halwa, and oppose weaponisation or any arms race in outer space,” it reads.
Holy Cow vs. Cash Cow
A day after intimating to public “bombs-like” evidences against the son of the PCO Chief Justice – Unlike ex Chief Minister Sindh Zulfiqar Mirza who despite heavy media coverage and holding Holy Quran in his hand could proof nothing, Malik Riaz, the real estate tycoon holding the same book presented evidences to the Supreme Court that he had paid a whopping Rs 342.5 million to Arsalan Iftikhar, who he claimed was running the judiciary like a “don”.
Call it Bahriagate or Familygate, one thing I liked about the whole Malik Riaz vs Arsalan Iftekhar episode is finally we have ‘judiciary’ to talk about. Earlier the anchors, journalists and the nation in general had only politician to target but the reemergence of Arsalan Iftekhar has given Pakistani media and common people a chance to thoroughly examine the so called Holycow.
In past corruption within judiciary especially in lower courts had conveniently been ignored under the garb of supremacy of judiciary but not now. The time has come to call spade a spade, thanks to Musharraf for setting the media free.
This time, the cash cow, Malik Riaz has come up with various allegations against Chief Justice’s son although top judge was aware of the scam for six months but by the passage of time as the case further unfolds we would be able to know why Chief Justice never took action on his son’s alleged corruption cases.
Arsalan Iftekhar is not new to the scandals. Earlier the then President Pervez Musharraf leveled allegations against him but none of them proven due to the politically charged environment during (in) famous Lawyer’s movement.
Though apparently the case has nothing to do with CJ and to keep the judicial process fair and transparent Chief Justice is asked to distance himself from the case however to an extent this historical scandal is connected to him since it gives one hope to think that the chief justice has impartially taken action against the reports of his son’s alleged involvement in corruption and that the country is moving towards a progressive society where the elites are also reprimanded, if found guilty.
On the other hand political parties including PPP playing their cards wisely by silencing themselves except the pointscorers PML N and PTI jumped into the already subjudice matter.
In his first public statement, Imran Khan “extended” his support to the judiciary in the alleged corruption scandal of Arsalan Iftekhar and said that the sequence of events clearly shows that the target of the entire “conspiracy” was the Chief Justice of Pakistan, Iftikhar Muhammad Chaudhry as a result BBC URDU without wasting time exposed Imran Khan for enjoying financial support for PTI Lahore rally by Malik Riaz.
Our politicians need to understand the sensitivity of this case, its hightime for them to act mature and monitor the entire process with honesty since nation is in the process of change. Not the change that we hear in political Jalsas but the real one that is going to decide fate of many politicians, businessmen and above all “Holy cows”.
Creative Coke Commercial
I don’t know whether it’s original, no idea who did it but this little creativity has definitely brought smile on my face. Would love to share with you guys. Enjoy : )
Lahore through the eyes of Karachite
After spending seven great days in Lahore, I am convinced that Lahore, being the cultural hub of the country, is one of the most beautiful cities of Pakistan. I applaud the chief minister of Punjab, who despite having a barrage of flaws in his governance, especially with regards to health, education and law and order sectors, has successfully been able to maintain the beauty of this city.
Unlike any other provincial government, the government of Punjab makes a conscious effort to give beautification the priority that it deserves by strictly adhering to a no-graffiti policy; hence we are greeted with beautiful and clean walls as seen in other civilised nations. This, however, is not true for Karachi, a city where there is more graffiti than there are walls.
The roads, despite being narrow, have managed to accommodate smooth traffic flow with strict traffic laws, all thanks to the Chaudhry brothers for setting a bench mark in the traffic management sector.
The difference between the two cities can be seen from the time of arrival at the respective airports.
In Karachi, when we get out of the airport premises, we are welcomed by huge billboards of Shahi Syed followed by the Sunni Tehreek, Pir Pagara and Sindhi nationalist leaders giving visitors a feel of the political environment in the city that overshadows beauty.
Lahore, on the other hand, has a more aesthetic appeal. The route back from the airport is covered with lush green and yellow mustard fields, shamelessly boasting the beauty and splendour they behold.
Although this is just one of the few good aspects of Lahore, one of the things that would be seen as most commendable by Karachiites, is the fact that a majority of homes in Lahore have low boundary walls around their houses, showing that they are very comfortable with their environment and do not feel threatened by any lack of security.
Karachiites, on the other hand, apart from installing top notch security systems in their houses, not only build high walls but further burglar proof it by setting up broken glass pieces or pointed iron on the rims of the walls to protect their homes from potential thieves.
Lahore is famous for its food street and the deliciousness it offers, evidencing the fondness with which the people of Lahore enjoy their food.
In this case, Karachiites are enthusiastic about food too, but they are more concerned about eating the ‘right kind’ of healthy food than consuming everything for the sake of eating, which is a trait I found amusing about the Lahoris.
Personally, I found Lahore to be too provincial, with a lot of focus on just the Punjabi language and a lot of Punjabi people; however, Karachi prides itself on giving a true cosmopolitan feel to the city. Karachiites speak in English, write in Urdu, think in Balochi and dream in Sindhi.
Perhaps, it would be appropriate to attribute the unity amongst Lahoris, to the fact that Punjabi is the only language, apart from English and Urdu, spoken in Lahore. Karachi, with its complex demographics allows everyone to do whatever they feel is right in the garb of “Karachi is for everyone”.
The people of Lahore love Mustafa Kamal, but hate the MQM although Karachi’s mainstream political party has managed to open offices in various cities of Punjab. They love MQM’s well-spoken work force, organisation and management. While some urban Punjabis do hold a soft corner for the MQM, the majority does not.
But the one trait in Lahoris that impressed me the most was their civic sense. You won’t see them spitting pan or gutka on the roads or elsewhere; you won’t see people littering; they are more conscious of their environment and make an effort to keep it clean and beautiful.
Another interesting thing I observed is that there were hardly any cab services running in Lahore. Initially, I thought that the fortunate city with the help of the chief minister of Punjab would be rich with yellow cabs but surprisingly enough, this was not the case. The chief minister, however, is passionate to resolve the transportation issues for Lahories by initiating various CNG bus programs etc, ignoring the fact that the city bears at least three days off for CNG.
Funnily enough, the curiosity between the lifestyle of Karachiites and Lahoris is very evident, especially when Karachiites are shown around the city, the Lahoris boast their sky scrapers and shopping malls, all the while, subtly asking whether such things exist in Karachi or not. The cross province communication gap should be something that both cities work toward overcoming in the future.
In short, Karachi is a huge city trying to accommodate multiple cultures; it is fast-paced, pulsating and dynamic. But Lahore, including recent developments in the city’s infrastructure, prides itself on having safeguarded Pakistan’s rich culture and traditions, which may be lost to Karachiites but are reason enough for Lahore to be spoken about and visited.
Rehman Malik tops 2011 ‘Hall of Shame’
Be it Veena Malik, Shoaib Malik, or Rehman Malik, there is one thing I have realized; it’s not easy being a Malik in Pakistan.
The Maliks of Pakistan are forever surrounded by controversies. Despite stiff competition amongst politicians and artists who struggled to top the “hall of shame, 2011,” guess who has managed to secure the first position once again? Our very own, very dear, very entertaining, Dr Abdul Rehman Malik. To acknowledge his outstanding performance, he has even been awarded a PhD degree by the Syndicate of Karachi University in recognition of his “matchless services to the country.”
Some of his golden words uttered during the year 2011, that range from outlandish to hilarious, are listed as follows:
1) Statement: “If someone insulted Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), I, too, would shoot him”.
Event: On the assassination of Salmaan Taseer. The government responds in a way the authorities are supposed to: by promising the laws would stand, but Rehman Malik comes up with this bizarre statement instead.
Look my dear friend, who knows one fine day some Qadri pops out of my convoy and kill me for XYZ reason under the garb of blasphemy law, would any media man come to rescue me?
2) Statement: “I am thankful to the Taliban who did not carry out any attack on Shia Muslims and showed respect to their rituals.”
Event: During the event of Ashura, Rehman Malik passed another shocking statement to the media. He actually thanked the Taliban for not attacking Shia processions! And no, he did not stop there. Rehman went on to say that he had appealed to the Taliban, asking them to spare the processions of Shia Muslims, and that he was grateful that they responded positively to his appeal.
My friend, we must not pass sweeping statements on Taleban, like us they are human too. Shouldn’t we thank them for sparing us for at least one day, isn’t it a good deed?
3) Statement: ”The Tablighi missionary centre in Raiwaind is the breeding ground for extremism and terrorism in Pakistan as the centre has a major role in brainwashing the extremists.”
Event: Rehman Malik made this statement to the audience at the security think-tank International Institute of Strategic Studies (IISS) while speaking on the topic of ”Countering Extremism in South Asia’.
You need to watch movie “Khuda Kay Liye” and listen to Naseeruddin Shah closely, he says “Islam main Darhi hai, Darhi main Islam nahin”, now try to figure out what I mean.
4) Statement: ”If Google and Youtube do not help the Pakistan government, then Pakistan reserves the right to block these services to prevent terrorists from using it”.
Event: The Interior Minister when talking to the media at the FIA headquarters, urged the internet service providers to extend their help to the government for exterminating the menace of terrorism from the country.
I have warned Government of Googlistan and Republic of Youtube to cooperate with Pakistan at their best and they have agreed to keep a strict eye on terrorists using their web space to disrupt Pakistani soil. We will not spare them.
5) Statement: ”I had given a warning yesterday that there should be no match-fixing. This time I am watching it very closely. If any such thing happens we will take action”.
Event: Before the World Cup semi-final against India, Pakistani cricketers were warned beforehand not to indulge in any match-fixing by the Interior Minister Rehman Malik who said he was keeping a “close watch” on their activities.
My every statement has a philosophy behind it; we kept a close eye to watch players and didn’t let them match fix. They win, lose or even play under pressure due to my policing is not my headache. I want results.
6) Statement: “PML-N had embraced Osama bin Laden and was responsible for bringing Osama bin Laden from Egypt to Pakistan for his treatment”.
Event: Speaking at the National Assembly, Malik denied opposition leader Chaudhry Nisar’s claim that the government was sleeping while the US operation was carried out. He lashed out at PML-N for bringing Bin Laden to Pakistan.
All of you talk about 100 suitcases Nawaz Shareef brought to Saudi Arabia but forgets what he brought from there; Osama Bin Laden was packed in one of those suitcases, I will tell you the whole story at the “right time”.
7) Statement: ”Extortionists should quit extorting and leave the city”.
Event: Talking to the media after addressing a ceremony held at the Karachi Chamber of Commerce, Interior Minister Rehman Malik warned the extortionists and target killers to quit and leave Karachi else stern action will be taken against them. I bet they were scared.
Stupid warnings always work in my case; good extortionists would listen to me and leave the city, while “bad apples” will be left with no option but to disappear as well.
8) Statement: ”When it is reported that 100 people were killed due to target killing, investigations reveal that only 30 were its victims while 70 others died at the hands of their wives or girlfriends.”
Event: During the press conference in Quetta, when target killings were on an all time high in Karachi, the Interior Minister said that the reported figure of deaths due to target killing were not accurate because half the men were killed by the women in their lives. Now that’s some imagination Mr Malik has there. Too many action-thriller films I would say.
Along with Interior ministry I am given a task to handle “internal affair ministry” as well.
9) Statement: “They were wearing black clothes like in Star Wars movies, (one) with (a) suicide vest. They had small beards and two of them were between 20-22 years old while the third who blew himself up was about 25.”
Event: This classic comment erupted from Malik’s mouth when he was talking to the media after the PNS Mehran attack. Our dear Interior Minister came up with another bizarre analogy and compared terrorists’ outfits to Star Wars characters. Told you he was into action flicks and stuff.
One of your private Tv channels portrays me as Chulbul Malik but I proved them I am a Starwars Freak.
10) Statement: “All ground intelligence shows that Ilyas Kashmiri is dead. What I can say is that there is a 98 % chance he is dead”.
Event: Interior Minister Rehman Malik told the media that although he had no physical proof, he was ’98 % sure’ that senior al Qaeda operative Ilyas Kashmiri was killed in a US drone strike in South Waziristan. Let’s add clairvoyance to his list of countless other outstanding traits, shall we?
You won’t ever see me boasting about percentages or issuing loose statements.Can’t do much about this, I am a Maths Man too.
Life was never this Good
Yet again 26th December came, I expected just another birthday another set of stereotype greetings and the day would pass but contrary to my expectations it turned out to be an unforgettable experience for me.
I never knew that the next Government which is due to take charge in July 2012 (I.A) would give its comprehensive plan regarding birthday celebrations and other upcoming events.
I was strictly ordered to start following the guidelines issued by the ‘establishment’.
The would-be Prime Minister planned to give me special protocol between 23rd to 26th December. This time I didn’t need to sneak chocolates of my brother nor had to stay without gifts since everything was ready for me.
Celebrations included an official visit to Port grand, a detailed conversation regarding the event and many gifts including a stylish chronograph to keep punctuality ensured, a beautiful and fresh bouquet of flowers and a birthday souvenir in quite fantastic packing were handed over to me.
I admit the 3 day protocol was one of the best moments of my birthday, before this, 26th December was referred as Tsunami day but now things have changed. Post Tsunami regime has gone and I am full of life.
Thanks indeed for making it such a wonderful day for me!
Cheat One
Indeed, nothing beats meat!
Feudocracy wins: local bodies system dissolved
The seizure of City District Government Karachi (CDGK) accounts by the Sindh government pounded the last nail in the coffin of Karachi’s golden era. With the implementation of commissionerate system, all commissioners and District Coordination Officers will now have unlimited power to manage the affairs of the city. The announcement of restoring the colonial style of governance in 21st century has left many Karachiites shocked.
Generally when governments depart, they halt new projects fearing credit-sharing. However, the former Karachi mayor, even at the time of leaving his post, made sure that the numerous projects initiated during his tenure continue in due course. By his action, he had proved himself to be the “Miracle Man”, who turned a messed up city into a truly beautiful megacity.
During his 52-month-long tenure (1,560 days), 2,159 mega projects, each worth Rs 30 million to multiple billions, were completed. Besides, 337 big machines and logistics meant for various amenity works were also purchased.
For the very first time not only the master plan of the city was prepared and given a legal status in the history, but the CDGK also completed 35 flyovers and underpasses; 356 parks; 194 water and sanitation projects; 316 major and supplementary roads and 451 educational projects. As many as 110 projects were completed in rural areas. In the transport infrastructure, 255 bus stops and 116 pedestrian bridges and a big car parking plaza were completed.
On the other hand the tried, tested and failed commissionerate system which openly negates democracy to promote toadies, would reintroduce the monopoly of privileged class over the politics of the country. Interestingly this system is in no way functional in any of the country of the world.
The people of Pakistan, especially in Karachi, have already witnessed what wonders local bodies system brought for them. It was the way for efficiently resolving the problems of the people at the lowest level, the system that had empowered the people who could easily access their representatives whenever they wanted. The commissionerate system in contrast would build up the bureaucratic infrastructure and further ruin the lives of commoners.
The ruling party had comparatively an easier way to provide relief to the people of Sindh by continuing the successful local bodies system. People might have ignored the shortcomings of government if they were educated about the system that ensures betterment of their lifestyle.
It is a time when the nation is being dragged back to the Stone Age. The media should bring the advocates of the commissionerate system to debates and ask them why the system engineered by the British does not even exist in the UK anymore. Anchorpersons should ignite a debate to educate masses about the benefits of the local bodies system and how it delivered.
Indeed the local bodies system was introduced by a dictator, but the people of Pakistan extracted maximum benefit out of it and this is what “true democracy” is all about.
The Op-ed of “Pakistan Today“
While the President munches Popcorns
Habib Jalib must be turning in his grave at the recent brouhaha of Shahbaz Sharif’s rhetoric and his poetic embarrassment in an uncalled for rally against President Zardari.
This same address conveniently ignored corruption charges, bad governance and lawlessness in the very Punjab government headed by the Khadim-e-Aala in disguise.
It is no secret that the current People’s Party regime has not lived up to expectations. However, claiming to hang the President of a democratically elected government in the presence of free judiciary just goes to show the restlessness of the PML-N for their promised turn following after the current regime.
What the Chief Minister of Punjab uttered in the rally against President Zardari is hypocritical to say in the least as the same corruption and bad governance model can be witnessed in Punjab too, where dengue is still at large. Moreover, lady health workers protesting against non-payment of their salaries, mismanagement in railway employees pension, and the violent agitation by the students in the online result fiasco are some of the clear cut indicators of what the Sharifs are up to.
On the other hand, Pakistan Tehreek e Insaaf’s rally showcased around approximately 100,000 people, including youngsters who were hoping for a changing Pakistan. The growing rift between the PTI and PML-N in Punjab is setting new trends of political boasting in the province.
The power hungry politicians, instead of conducting a decent round table conference to provide a solution to the people of Pakistan are impatiently looking for the power base of Islamabad.
So far President Zardari’s politics are considered to be smart. His strategy of reconciliation with the MQM, ANP and PML-Q has successfully helped him secure the President house and quite likely another tenure as well.
The sudden jump of the MQM into the PML-N vs PTI tournament has given a new attraction to TV channels and political enthusiasts of this unfortunate nation. Last weekend, the nation was all set to witness the beginning of a series of rallies and protests on non-issues that actually proved the seriousness of our leaders towards the prosperity of Pakistan.
However the consequences of the political circus in Pakistan and the fight for proving ‘our political show has a larger crowd than yours’ caused systematic frustration in the sensible lot of Pakistanis. In such circumstances a Pakistani with even with a bit of eminence has lost the charm he/she once had in the Pakistani nation. It goes thus, that they would feel no urgency in voting for any politician with the hope of change, since they all seem to be equally petty and childish. Surely we can all agree that current politics is no basis for real enthusiasm.
Unless the people of Pakistan stand up by themselves under the non-political entities and march for their rights towards a just cause, we won’t witness any change at all, since the most shrewd man of this country has brought our politicians at each other’s throats while he’s munching pop corn in the safety of the President house.
A Minute full of Nonsense
Do you know consumption of food with pork ingredients deteriorate heart? A scientific research has recently revealed the fact that anything that contains pork powder weakens heart. Why Jew people are cowards, because they consume pork. A Chemist was enlightening the bearded young man at Pharmacy when I reached there to get my father’s medicine.
If it is so then why are you selling Lays chips? Lays also contain pork extracts. Bearded young man inquired.
Oh Lays! people come to me and ask for it, it’s my duty to offer them whatever they want, said pharmacist. He further added that, we used to go abroad to see “Angrez” but just now you saw an American lady walking on the street. See Obama is coming — America preparing to attack us…
With smiles on my face I took medicine and left the shop keeping in mind that pork is prohibited in Judaism, if Jews were cowards they would not have put fear of little Israel into entire oil rich Arab world –but I was in no mood to waste my time with these morons. They are sick!
Such a disappointing situation for the poor country created on the basis of “Two of Nation” theory, in next few years I foresee further rise of religious fanaticism in Pakistan.
These 60 seconds reveal a bleak but true picture of Pakistan, if a common Pakistani and that too from Karachi think on such lines what would a cleric in Waziristan would be teaching to his madarsah students.
Think about it!
Let’s play: 20 questions for Zulfiqar Mirza
Sindh’s former home minister Zulfiqar Mirza has announced his resignation from the government in yet another media circus.
During TV interviews he made personal attacks against journalists and politicians, making references to their facial features and appearance. However, his emotional outburst left lots of questions on the policy of the government unanswered.
A few questions I would like to ask Mr Mirza are:
1) If you claim to be so truthful, why have you never made these revelations before?
2) According to you, Rehman Malik does everything on the discretion of President Asif Ali Zardari. Why then is Rehman Malik accused of conspiring against the People’s Party and not President Zardari?
3) Is the president of Pakistan Asif Ali Zardari a fool to not understand the shrewdness of Rehman Malik?
4) Mirza Sahab, why did you never raise your voice in 2001 (or afterwards) when you got to know that MQM chief Altaf Hussain wrote a letter against the ISI?
5) What exactly made you speak up after the discovery of the torture cells and ammunition from Lyari?
6) You acknowledge that Rehman Malik is a “good politician and a good human being” but maintain that he is also a compulsive liar. What does this mean?
7) You placed the Holy Quran on your head and said that MQM has a false mandate in Karachi and Hyderabad. How many petitions have you filed in court about this?
8.) Why are superior courts, Pakistani forces and Pakistani law enforcement agencies not taking any action on the MQM’s alleged crimes? Is the MQM really that powerful?
9) CPLC recovered most of the kidnapped people from Lyari. Is this the reason why the CPLC chief, Ahmed Chinoy, has suddenly turned into a villain?
10) You seem to be very worried about the people of Sindh. Why are you obsessed with Karachi only? Has karo-kari, dacoity and corruption ended in interior Sindh?
11) How come you know “ALL” the killers except Benazir’s ?
12) You say that you will fight against the criminal elements of Karachi in your private capacity. Is this legal?
13) Keeping in mind that a civilian cannot take the law into his own hands, how would you decide who is a criminal and who is not?
14) You claim that you haven’t recruited any MQM worker in the Sindh Police, and that recruitment in the police department was done on merit only. If this is so, then why does corruption and incompetency still prevail in the Sindh Police?
15) Why are the ISI chief and Army Generals not taking action on your “substantiated evidence”?
16) When are you going to the Supreme Court to submit this evidence?
17) How exactly have President Asif Zardari and the late Benazir Bhutto helped you in acquiring such a huge amount of money, villas, cars, sugar mills and thousands of acres of lands?
18) You alleged that during a meeting in London, the MQM chief Altaf Hussain had told you that America and other world powers had decided to ‘break’ Pakistan, and that Altaf Hussain had supported their idea. Since when has Altaf Hussain started sharing such secrets with you?
19) If America wants to break Pakistan up, according to you, then why did you go to the enemy country for a 40-day vacation?
20) Sir, do you still stand by your slogan “Pakistan na Khappay” (We don’t want Pakistan)?
Management
Management in all business and organizational activities is the act of getting people together to accomplish desired goals and objectives using available resources efficiently and effectively
Smooth sailing: Cable tv repair guys on duty to resolve customer complaints
Karachi: Instead of carrying long ladders on pick up van – we often come across Tv cable guys dragging their ladder by fixing one side of it on Motorbike leaving the other one on road creating unpleasant sound. Such practice saves their additional transportation cost.
However in this particular picture a comparatively sensible cable provider using his management skills has fixed his ladder behind its bike to avoid getting the ladder scratched on the road surface causing smooth and cost effective transportation of ladder on motorbike to different homes for cable Tv installation.
What’s wrong with Muslims ?
Couldn’t resist sharing the knowledgeable commentary of Pakistan’s renowned intellectual Mr. Hassan Nisar . Please listen to him carefully and understand the reasons behind failure of Muslims.
MV Suez Episode: A Blessing in Disguise
Crew of Egyptian-registered boat M.V. Suez who were held hostages by Somali pirates wave upon their arrival at the port city of Karachi. -AFP Photo
Unprecedented emotional scenes played out in Karachi on Thursday after the crew of the Egyptian ship MV Suez comprising Pakistanis, Indians and others hit the “land of pure” after being captured by Somalian pirates.
The heroes of the moment are Human Rights activist Ansar Burney, Pakistani Navy and Governor Sindh Ishrat ul Ibad Khan who through their determination and sincerity have turned impossible into possible.
Along with these persons it was actually the Pakistani media that not only initiated a campaign but kept a strong follow up on the developing story.
For the first time ever I have witnessed institutions of Pakistan through a well-coordinated effort have accomplished an objective. The NGO, Political Party, Pakistan Navy and the Media have done a marvelous job by pursuing an almost unachievable task that has helped nation rebuilding its soft image.
While watching the MV Suez News telecasted couple of month ago the only thing clicked into my mind was the role of political parties in this particular episode, I asked a question to myself whether the claimants of patriotism would ever get up to prove themselves although I never kept my hopes high since this issue needed to be handled by the Pakistani Armed forces and on Government level but to my surprise it was the Muttahida Qaumi Movement (MQM) that took notice of a little girl Laila’s appeal for saving her father and other crew members of the MV Suez that was captured by the pirates since 10 months.
As Pakistan is experiencing the worst form of governance in its history, its political forces, institutions and even judiciary are not performing upto the expectations of a common man yet the nation with full of potentials have shown its tendency to bounce back and resolved a highly sensitive issue without depending on any foreign aid.
The very example of MV Suez not only speaks volume about the general behavior of nation’s mindset but spread the message to the Pakistanis and world at large that the successful release of various nationals is a reflection of a broader and positive mentality of the entire Pakistani nation.
Now the world should reconsider its attitude towards Pakistan and accept it as a nation that has played a crucial role in fighting a war against terrorism on various fronts and in the struggle of achieving peace it has become a victim of terrorism.
As a Pakistani when I recall the entire MV Suez episode my trust on the heroes of my nation restores, it is also a lesson for the two big parties of Pakistan not to indulge in war of words but to come up with something concrete as it’s actually a job of Governments to show interest in International kidnapping cases and ensure release of their citizens.
I see the release of MV Suez hostages as blessing in disguise that has given us an opportunity to self reliance and think beyond caste, creed and color.
Pakistan Zindabad!
Bizarre Petitions
Pakistan is going through one of the worst periods of its history; our nation is engaged in watching current affairs programs and political talk shows which although become cause of raising blood pressure provide a sense of entertainment as well. The suitors might be emotional about their petitions but the audiences sitting in the court room definitely enjoy those cases. I have skimmed a few interesting petitions filed against celebrities that will help us understand social and religious fabric of this country.
JUI-S leaders demand ban on Bible
Petition: Addressing a press conference at the Masjid-e-Khizra, Jamiat Ulema-e-Islam (Samiul Haq) leader Maulana Abdul Rauf Farooqi and others appealed to the Supreme Court of Pakistan to take suo motu notice of the “blasphemous” materials added to the Bible otherwise they would move the court for banning the book, for which a panel of lawyers was already working.
A perfect example of Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world. Its growth now be experienced in Bible as well.
Petition to conduct Meera’s virginity test
Petition: Atiq ur Rehman in an application sought to conduct a test to determine whether Meera was a virgin.
Instead of convincing judiciary about his marriage, Atiq ur Rehman came up with a creative idea of testing Meera’s virginity. Although judge has declined the plea keeping the fact in mind that such test might open another Pandora box for Meera.
Petition filed againt Meera for performing in “immoral scenes”
Petition: The petition was filed against Meera in the Sindh High Court in Karachi stating that she had performed in “immoral scenes” that did not match with Pakistan’s religious and social values.
The patriotic petitioner has perhaps forgotten the stage performances and weird rainy dances of Lollywood but I liked the idea of curbing export of talent from the land of pure.
Waseem Akram hurt Muslims religious sentiments
Petition: The petition filed by Mohammad Fayyaz, in civil court Lahore that former Pakistani cricket great Wasim Akram has damaged Muslim sentiment for posing in a liquor advertisement.
Muslims may not have problem endorsing terrorists blowing twin towers but their sentiments would definitely hurt seeing their Muslim brother having whiskey glass in a mere advertisement.
Parveen brings Abrar ul Haq to Supreme Court
Petition: The Supreme Court had summoned the singer for an explanation over the song.
“Ne Parveen tu bari namkeen; oper sey tu miskeen, andar sey tu bari shauqeen.” How could the only Parveen on earth Abrar was singing about could be so spicy when she herself denies being so?
Fauzia for prioritizing constitution of Pakistan
Petition: Case filed against Central Secretary Information PPP Fauzia Wahab in Session Court Lahore regarding her statement for prioritizing constitution of Pakistan over Holy Quran.
In a country where Sharia is not implemented and constitutional is known as law of the land, Fauzia Wahab should have shut her mouth rather than being logical.
Imran Khan for being dad of illegitimate child
Petition: The reference had been filed by MQM under Articles 62 and 63 of the Constitution and the Public Representation Act, 1978 against Imran Khan that he was father of a daughter of Anna Luise alias Sita White born out of wedlock.
It was MQM’s first attempt to screen parliamentarians to make sure that only pious members could have admission rights in assembly.
Justice Rana Bhagwandas for being “Hindu”
Petition: The petition said no Non Muslim judge is authorized to administer oath to the president of Pakistan nor the constitution assigns constitutional obligations to the non Muslim judge in place of Muslim judge.
Pakistan was made in the name of Islam, can’t Muslims differentiate between evil and good. Why Hindu in superior judiciary and that too ‘BHAGWAN’das – The Bigger Hindu?
Rahat Fateh Ali Khan uttered improper words about God
Petition: The petitioner said that by singing the song “Aj Din Charhia Teray Rang Warga” Khan had denied the power and oneness of God.
Indeed protecting the powers of God is the duty of His followers.
Veena Malik for committing ‘immoral and un-Islamic acts’
Petition: A case has been filed in a Lahore court against Pakistani actress Veena Malik for committing ‘immoral and un-Islamic acts’ during her appearance on the Indian reality TV show ‘Big Boss’.
She could have done that in Pakistan as well. Why Big Boss and that too with Indians? Not Fair!
Petition to end the trial of assassin Malik Mumtaz Qadri
Petition: Mr Awan in his appeal had maintained that Mumtaz Qadri had killed Mr Taseer because no criminal case was registered against the governor for criticizing the blasphemy laws in public.
Petition further read that Pakistani law states that capital punishment will be handed to those who blaspheme. “Chief Justice Mumtaz Qadri” has just awarded Taseer his due death sentence.
Petition seeks to empower army chief
Petition: Tehreek-i-Inqilab Pakistan chairman Advocate Rana Ilmuddin Ghazi filed the petition, contending that the army had been unable to take prompt action to stop the American operation in Abbottabad because the power to take such a decision rested with President Asif Zardari and not Chief of Army Staff General Ashfaq Parvez Kayani.
Empowering COAS General Kayani and assigning him the power of President and Prime Minister would definitely curb terrorism and mess this nation is going through but keep in mind, the petitioner is not supporting dictatorship.
Petition against Ms.Kim Barker for getting “sexually harassed” by Nawaz Shareef
Petition: Advocate Masood Gujjar filed the petition stating that the allegation of sexual harassment by Ms. Barker is part of a character assassination in which she claimed that Nawaz Sharif gave her an Apple Iphone as a gift and asked her to be his “special friend.
The gift was offered by would- be Amir ul Momineen of Pakistan. Ms Barker should not have been sexually harassed by the spiritual leader of ‘Noon League’. She indeed deserves punishment for not being a special friend of Mr. “Shareef”.
Petition against media from airing news related to fake degrees of legislators
Petition: A case filed by PML Q, MPA seeking for an order to stop media from airing news related to fake degrees of legislators.
Such news gives a bad impact on masses and in international community. Why media has problems with someone’s degree. Are they unaware of the fact that ‘a degree is a degree whether fake or original’?
Rehman Malik sued over incorrect recitation of Quranic verses.
Petition: A constitutional petition was filed in the Supreme Court of Pakistan seeking the disqualification of Interior Minister, Senator Rehman Malik, over incorrect recitation of Quranic verses.
Wonder how this country would progress when we have interior minister who can’t recite correct versus. I am sure he wouldn’t be able to disincentive suicide bombers.
Case against Mubashir Luqman for inviting Qadiyani spiritual leader in Tv program.
Petition: The petitioner held that on June 2, 2010, the channel broadcast its programme (Point-Blank with Luqman) in which spiritual leader of Qadianis– was also invited “which hurt my and millions of fellow Muslims’ religious sensibilities”
I reiterate this land was made for Muslims, the same Muslims whom majority of the fellow Muslims accept. No other sect, religion or cartoon should be allowed to appear on Tv that hurt Pakistanis Muslims’ sentiments.
Petition to remove Musharraf’s name from official record
Petition: Former President, Rafiq Tarar filed petition in the Lahore High Court (LHC), seeking to remove Musharraf’s name from official record.
Musharraf was a dictator, he grabbed powers unconstitutionally and whatever he did was against the constitution of Pakistan except the oaths subsequent assembly took from him, infrastructure, development and technology he has brought to this nation.
Priceless Letters
Cute letters kids have written to God
During slide show please use Play and Stop option to view letters according to your convenience.
Enjoying the Silence
It was a happening day today. My morning started with the Breaking News that the US forces have killed Osama Bin Laden. Perhaps the hottest news after 9/11 ?
I considered myself lucky to be one of those few Pakistanis who got a chance to tune crazy news channels when my fellow countrymen were preparing to go work early morning. I , instead of paying heed to brush my teeth preferred concentrating on Tv and swapped various channels to extract more and more information until satisfied.
Once I got enough information I decided to spread bulk text messages to my long contact list on the issue that I named “Massive Development”. By doing so I wanted to astonish them and recognized as someone who is more updated than anybody else in the country. (The Geo Syndrome). I so wanted to start off my day at work by discussing the news already shared with my colleagues at workplace and it happened. They welcomed me with the sarcastic congratulation messages.
Time to time this particular news had been discussed with the extra spice of incoming information including the fate of OBL’s dead body etc.
However in evening when I took a journey towards home the scene on roads was entirely unexpected. I thought Osama’s become history now but wait, What the hell that man wearing Jeans and a T shirt with branded shades was doing right in the middle of the road!? He had a long tail of “frightened cars” waiting behind the DON that once he finished couple of magazine they could go to their destinations.
Was he an Al Qaida Man getting his frustration out on OBL’s death ? No, how could he be so cool and urbane — I thought!
Later I got to know about the second major development took place in Karachi , the target killing and all but thank God I reached home safely through alternate routes.
Now its 2 Am and — things are apparently calm around me though media is still high – I am fed up of watching the same Breaking news again and again.
Yes Osama Bin Laden is dead. Now what ? We’ve already had enough of Terrorism, Mullahism. Extremism, Barelvism which is treated by a good doze of Tanzeelism.
Now give it a break please and enjoy the silence…
I shall bear witness…
On the contrary to Faiz Ahmed Faiz’s famous poetry ‘Hum Dekhengay‘ where he paints doom’s day scenario as ultimate revolution and leaves the matter to God only, Strings have talked on realistic grounds, they have subtly invoked common Pakistani’s emotions who are eager to witness revolution TODAY and for that matter Pakistanis are urged to bring about change by themselves and not by waiting for any messiah or God’s miracle on judgment day.
India vs Pakistan: Pre Match Rants
Mentioned are a few ‘Golden statements’ from the Pakistani cricket fans which are memorable for not because they don’t make sense but they really sound hilarious. Here are the 15 out of the ordinary statements I’ve heard from different “self proclaimed cricketing gurus” around me lately, all of whom depict an interesting version of what’s going to happen in Pakistan vs India Semi Final which is to be played in Mohali on March 30th.
Although I find no common sense in their analysis yet there is a lot of interesting stuff to talk about and to have a good laugh for some time.
Few of them are as follows;
1-Pakistan was given a place in the semi-final as a reward for releasing Raymond Davis.
2- Shoaib Akhtar deserves to play in Semi Final but since Kamran Akmal is not capable to catch his fastest deliveries Shoaib will remain out of the squad.
3- Indians will try their level best to lose against Australia in quarter finals because if India wins against Australia and lose in Semi Finals against Pakistan they will be beaten to death by furious Indian crowd.
4- There is no point in reaching Mohali a week before, Pakistani players will be sold out.
5- Indians are good at black magic; just see how their Pundits put amulet under Mohali pitch.
6- The Mohali pitch has been developed to assist the Indian players.
7- Pakistanis will lose the match because they know Indian crowd will beat the hell out of our players if they win the game.
8- See how Indian spectators will ruin the match when they will feel Pakistan winning.
9- There is a reason why Pakistan will not lose the semi final, 18 crore Pakistani Muslims, Bengalis and lots of Indian Muslims will be praying for them.
10- RAW conspiring to use Indian bookies to bring down Pakistani team.
11- Bal Thakrey won’t cause any threat to team Pakistan. He is afraid of Dawood Ibrahim.
12- This time Pakistan will win the match because we don’t have “Sattay Baaz” in the squad.
13- Shoaib Akhtar will rip Kamran Akmal apart on the field if he drops any more catches when he is bowling.
14- How could Pakistan win when we have no implementation of Islam in this country.
15 – Bal Thakeray is actually an ISI double-agent. His job is to malign India’s reputation by threatening the Pakistan cricket team.
Amir opts to complete “education” during ban
Lahore (Staff Reporter): The 18-year-old abandoned his Bachelors of corruption degree when
he started globetrotting as his career without completing his degree with Team Pakistan took off but his promising future was abruptly halted after he was found guilty of being unprofessional in corruption by an International Cricket Council tribunal last month.
Handed a five-year ban from the sport, Amir said he wanted to use the time “productively”.
“I had to leave my college of corruption and match fixing” because of my full-time match fixing profession in cricket once I was selected for Pakistan. But now I am trying privately to get a college degree in match fixing,” the teenager said on the private tv channel.
“I am passing through the toughest period of my life and I have realized just how important it is to acquire comprehensive education in match fixing.”
Many Pakistan players such as Amir hail from rural backgrounds and are unable to get a proper education in match or fancy fixing unlike Waseem Akram, Saleem Malik or Ata ur Rehman.
With his career now on hold, he said his family suggested he should focus on his proper Bachelors of corruption degree to remain busy and productive in future.
“I regret not being able to play in the World Cup but I watch the matches. One thing this episode has taught me is to strengthen yourself in fraudulency before jumping into cricket team”
Revolution
Those who think Pakistan is on the brink of revolution must understand that it is the ‘nation’ that undergoes revolution not ethnicities. Pakistan is comprised by a bunch of ethnicities that never experienced the joy of unity , a basic prerequisite to Revolution.
We Love you Bal Thakre!
The right-wing Shiv Sena on Thursday declared that party chief Bal Thackeray will decide if Pakistan can play in Mumbai if the team makes it to the final of World Cup 2011. According to a report published in The Hindu, party leader Manohar Joshi has said that the Shiv Sena chief will make the final decision of allowing the Pakistani team to play in Mumbai.
“You all know Sena chief Bal Thackeray’s views. If the Pakistan team reaches the final (scheduled in Mumbai), whether to allow them to play, the Sena chief will decide” : Source: Express Tribune
Few years ago when Shiv Sena activists spoiled the pitch of Feroze Shah Kotla Stadium, Delhi on the orders of Bal Thakre which caused a huge damage to India’s reputation in the world of cricket. A very good friend of mine then told me that Bal Thakrey is an ISI agent, Thakre does things that make India laughing stock in front of the world . I obviously rejected his claim and made fun of him but today when the self proclaimed king of Mumbai indicated that he will decide whether to let Pakistan play in finals (if qualifies)in Mumbai , he seemed superficially correct.
Yet again Thakre has come up with a creative strategy to defame India in the name of Pakistan and made his homeland embarrassed but this is not an end. Thakre’s opposition to let Pakistan play in finals will automatically lead Team Pakistan win the world cup match as it happened during 1996 world cup in Calcutta when India, who had beaten Pakistan in the quarter-finals, were facing defeat against Sri Lanka at 120-8 chasing 252 when disturbances began.
The spectators, annoyed with the hosts’ dismal batting show, threw bottle missiles on to the field and lit fires in the stands, forcing match-referee Clive Lloyd of the West Indies to award the game to Sri Lanka. I wish Shiv Sena do what they are known for and help Pakistan lift WC trophy that too in Mumbai.
We love you Bal Thakrey!
Jai Maharashtra!
The Acculturation of Pakistan
Every afternoon during the office lunch hours I drive towards different restaurants in the vicinity to try new places and break the monotony I usually develop from eating in the same ones. However I witnessed a different set-up today, the shops I crossed appeared entirely different from regular, and they were beautifully decorated with big red heart shaped balloons, cupids and buntings of Valentine ’s Day and visibly flooded with young girls and boys shopping for their dear ones. The kids on the street who are usually found cleaning the wind screen of the cars were now vendors of bouquets of roses to the commuters.
Cars with tinted glasses were cruising towards sea view, few girls covering their face with the Naqab sitting with their dream prince on the motorbikes leaving for the unknown destiny, perhaps a safer place where they could not be noticeable to their relatives was a common sight.
Even the mall i.e. next to my work place was giving an impression of safe haven for love birds that could freely roam around holding their partner’s hands, sitting close to them in the food court or parks and buy lots of gifts from their parent’s money just to ‘prove’ their love. In short the market created an ambiance pretty favourable for the young love birds who despite little bit of apprehension were managing to spend a good time with their partners, which I found was quite charming.
On the other hand among the somber circles Valentine’s Day remained talk of the town harping on the issue; ‘whether our society really need to celebrate the event or is it even Islamic?’
I although belong to the school of thought which has no concern with the ones who celebrate it passionately or find this day as an opportunity to express love. Nevertheless this year I observed an extraordinary boom in the trend of celebrating Valentine ’s Day, even to an extent of wearing red or pink outfits at work places. The heavy media coverage and peculiar scrolls of personal dedications to the loved ones with desi expressions like Jaan, Jaanu, Muaaah, Jaaneman on every Tv channel and radio made me think about a different genre of culture we are developing.
Although I tried to ditch this thought with the feeling that at least they were not shooting each other or firing on the mosques that claim hundreds of innocent lives on almost daily basis yet I could not convince myself with the scenario I witnessed today. This was not the Pakistan where I have grown up; the much simpler times of the 90’s. Love was indeed present but with the delightful appearance like the one in the songs of vital signs, strings, etc. Contrary to it now there was a phony public display of the feelings dependent on material stuff. This was never a part of Pakistani culture, let alone Islamic.
I am indifferent to the discussion whether celebrating Valentine’s Day is Islamically forbidden but what I disagree of is the very culture of Pakistan which deteriorating to the lowest ebb.
How can we adopt a particular festivity which we dare not celebrate openly? A celebration where we have hunt for places that are not easily accessible to our relatives and parents? On what grounds can we justify rejoicing something which we are actually afraid of, which involves deceiving the morality of our family and culture.
I can certainly not consider this as modernization of the Pakistani society. In plain terms this is westernization of the society (read not modernization). Our way to celebrate love is not defined within the parameters of a particular Day nor is it dependent on it. I reckon that love demands expression but every culture has its own values and demands that must not be diluted in the name of acculturation.
KESC’s Downsizing Drive: A Right decision at Wrong Time
The economic crisis which engulfed the world a couple of years back have appeared in Pakistan. The weakening economy is leaving its mark in every sector and the worst hit seems to be the Karachi Electric Supply Corporation (KESC) which was already a victim of corruption and a house of ‘ghost employees’ until the then President General Musharraf privatized the utility company to provide uninterrupted electricity to Karachites. The KESC fulfilled its promise and restructured the organization on revolutionary lines, from lodging FIRs against the electricity thieves to reducing the load shedding hours as less as 3 hours (comparing with rest of the nation facing more than 10 hours of load shedding). KESC took all necessary measures to turn the white elephant into productive organization.
In an attempt to continue with restructuring and to make the company financially viable the KESC has decided to get rid of those employees who considered burden on organization as a result KESC is forced to lay off 4,000 of its unproductive workers, while 500 employees opted for Voluntarily Separation Scheme (VSS) under a cost-cutting drive. Most of the lay-off workers were from five different categories – security guards, bill distributors, sanitary workers, drivers and clerical workers who are offered one month’s advance salary and gratuity benefits as a result Collective bargaining agents and union leaders have rejected the policy and opted to confront the management by all means.
With the passing days the KESC’s turmoil is increasing and the situation is getting more and more complex especially the scenario at the KESC Head office which is surrounded by a huge mob of sacked employees and their sympathizers representing the banners of several political parties. The live media coverage has managed to gain the support of the ill informed people of Pakistan who think in favor of the sacked employees considered as a liability by the utility company.
Indeed KESC is not an employment bureau however in a highly polarized country like Pakistan where political parties literally find issues to exploit and make maximum benefit out of them; corporate likes KESC should have conscientiously handled this particular issue foreseeing the post decision chaos. At this point in time mass downsizing would be an unwise step by the company when the country’s economic situation is alarming and Government and all other political parties are trying to capitalize issues for gaining public sympathy.
KESC’s step looks impudent, and the situation doesn’t seem to go in the favor of their decision to lay off the employees. Instead they must come up with “safe strategy” which could be implemented to achieve the objectives gradually. The company should pursuit the policy of downsizing but in a subtle and planned way which will leave very less scope for the labor unions to strengthen.
As an alternative, the company should also revise the appraisals policy which could be determined by company’s profit or productivity measures.
After restoration, all employees should be systematically included in the part of wage reduction program. It would not be fair to slash the wages of entry-level or non-management recruits only, such decisions will further spur discontentment among employees who were initially being targeted. However as soon as the wages are reduced with no security of appraisals, the non performing staff already working on less wages would definitely look for the soon-to-expire- lucrative Voluntarily Separation Scheme (VSS).
In short the company should devise a smart strategy to divide workers unions with cost reduction plans which will definitely help KESC achieve productivity and its objectives in long term.
2010 in review
The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:
The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow.
Crunchy numbers
The average container ship can carry about 4,500 containers. This blog was viewed about 18,000 times in 2010. If each view were a shipping container, your blog would have filled about 4 fully loaded ships.
In 2010, there were 51 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 88 posts. There were 314 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 55mb. That’s about 6 pictures per week.
The busiest day of the year was August 14th with 384 views. The most popular post that day was Mountain Dew embraces Islam.
Where did they come from?
The top referring sites in 2010 were tribune.com.pk, orkut.com, pakpositive.com, blogs.tribune.com.pk, and facebook.com.
Some visitors came searching, mostly for sathi condom pic, tanzeel, politically incorrect quotes, tanzeelism, and pakistan flag.
Attractions in 2010
These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.
Mountain Dew embraces Islam August 2010
29 comments
Taliban Stir Muted Sympathy May 2010
186 comments and 1 Like on WordPress.com,
Tanzeel January 2009
60 comments
The Ultimate Politically Incorrect Quotes October 2010
52 comments and 2 Likes on WordPress.com
Pakistan under the Microscope May 2010
49 comments
Pakistan’s Mullahpoly: My way or the highway
Copyright gives the author of an original work exclusive right for a certain time period in relation to that work, including its publication, distribution and adaptation, after which time the work is said to enter the public domain.
Readers must be surprised to see the implementation of copyright concept in the religion of truth revealed by Allah that actually has no connection with materialism but it’s a fact, in Pakistan Islam has been perceived as a corporation that exist as a product of corporate law (Pakistan’s Constitution), and its rules balance the interests of the management (Religious Fanatics) who solely operate the Islamic corporation in Pakistan. Creditors(Islamic sects) who loan its goods, services; shareholders (Madarsa Owners) that invest their capital (Madarsah Education) and the employees (Jihadi Brigade) who contribute their labor to achieve and save guard vested interests of Islam Inc.
We have learned and taught that Islam is the religion for everyone. Every Muslim has the right to study and practice it. Today we have different sects in Islam who are free to preach and practice their versions but unlike all there is a “Non Muslim” group too whom we usually call “Qadyanis” and have officially declared them Non Muslims.
I don’t want to go into the debate whether they are Muslims but my concern is even if they are declared as minorities why Pakistani Govt do not allow them to peach their religion. We all know that Islam is the fastest growing religion and can never be abolished yet we are not ready to believe in Allah who has taken sole responsibility to save the book and religion till the end.
Somewhere I have read that the time when Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto had appeared on the political scene with his political slogans of:
Islam is our religion
Democracy is our politics
Socialism is our economics
And won elections but over the year’s democracy and socialism faded into the background and Islam had come to the forefront especially when Bhutto had proclaimed Friday as the weekly holiday and declared Ahmedis as non-Muslims. That was the beginning of the nightmare of religious intolerance. The nightmare worsened during the era of Zia-ul-haq who handed over the religion to the illiterate “Mullahs” and tried to Islamize all aspects of civil life from schools to hospitals to government offices. He in consultation with the then religious scholars introduced law which resulted undermining of women’s rights. Introduction of Blasphemy Law worked as an insult to the minorities’ injuries which led to hundreds of innocent people being killed and jailed on mere allegations.
Today those draconian laws are still high in Pakistani society, we “the privileged” Sunni Muslims being in majority have the right to declare anyone Kafir or even kill in the name of religion just because we are made to believe that we are the true followers and custodians of Islam and its our prime duty to safeguard this entity that benefits us to achieve our objectives which we might not be able to accomplish on moral grounds however other sects do claim the same but being less in number they do not make their claims public but secretly.
If we go out on the streets we would find different brigades of bearded men wearing black, green, white, brown turbans belong to different sects and sub sects. They are more devoted to their religious doctrine than Islam. Apparently they claim to be brother of each other but if you talk to them separately they don’t spare a second to “prove” other sect Non Muslim.
However the Pakistan’s religious cartel has been agreed on the minimum common agenda that all Ahmedis are non Muslims and their entry into the religious market might reduce their profit share in the cake. Thus religious conglomerates of Pakistan have engineered separate laws to bar new player and even after declaring them Non Muslims they banned them to preach their version of Islam, let alone preaching, Pakistan is the only country where dominating religious scholars have established such a “Mullahpoly” that don’t even allow their competitor (Ahmedis) to even greet in Islamic way or recite Kalma however our traditional scholars are unaware of their competitor’s Guerilla Marketing strategy that relies on time, energy and imagination rather than a big marketing budget. Typically, Ahmedis campaigns are unexpected and unconventional; potentially friendly and people are targeted in unexpected places. Their way of unique, engaging and thought-provoking concept has successfully generated buzz and people in Pakistan hold a soft corner for them unlike before, they are not only heard but their eccentric and nonviolent propagations have made people to probe their set of beliefs which they spread in very organized and peaceful manner.
Recently a private tv channel has aired a video of “Ahemdi” Mosque near Faisalabad where policemen were vehemently defacing the word Allah and Kalima from their mosque and that too during prayers. On the other hand when our so called religious scholar was asked to throw light on this callous issue he was not only adamant to his dim point of view but came up with imprudent examples of copyright (i.e Kalima and Allah’s name are the copyrights of Muslims) that ultimately made fun of himself and the religion resulting support to Ahmedi group from the human rights organizations as well as majority of moderate Pakistanis.
youtube=http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=FDlH09Inx2E
Regardless of whatever logic our scholars present they cannot justify curbs on freedom of practicing religion as it is the clear violation of Pakistan’s constitution and Quaid e Azam’s thoughts who envisioned Pakistan as a moderate progressive nation where minorities are allowed to preach and practice their religion freely.
Jinnah in his opening speech to the constituent Assembly, said: “You are free to go to your temples; you are free to go to your mosques or to any other place of worship in this state of Pakistan. You may belong to any caste or creed – that has nothing to do with the business of the state.” but today’s Islamic Republic of Pakistan is entirely a different country than the one Jinnah had envisaged for us.
We are certainly living in the geographical location that Jinnah fought and struggled for, but in terms of vision and policy we are living in a chaotic mess with no improvement in future.
The Chocolate Story
Chocolates are one of my few weaknesses I can’t resist. Give me any kind of chocolate I would happily consume it and if you don’t. I will manage to have it anyway and this is exactly what I did lately.
On my birthday night (26th December) while on bed when I was reliving some good old memories my eyes scanned a Cadbury Pouch and a can of Pringle chips on the table with a balloon tied on it, being an optimist I assumed that this surprise-gift must be presented to me by my ‘loving siblings’ that I wondered how went unnoticed by me, to confirm this pleasant surprise while carrying the stuff I proudly walked into his room, to thank him.
Me: Sameer, who has given it to me, Adeel or you?
Sameer: What? Bhai keep it from where you have picked it. Faiza has brought it for me; this is my over due birthday’s gift she couldn’t present it on 23rd (Dec)
Me: Ohkay!
Sameer: You thought it was for you?
Me: Obviously, it’s my birthday what else would I assume, anyway open it. Let’s eat it.
Sameer: No, I will eat whenever I feel like, just drop it.
Me: Okay but do share it with me because I also gave you lots of chocolates when you were too young, you don’t remember.
Sameer: I don’t know you. Just drop the packet or I will hide them and you will get nothing.
Me: Hmm Okay! (walked into my room with heavy heart)
Later when he slept and nobody was around my mind started working, I did all arrangement to accomplish what I call a “Tasty Crime” project. All what I needed was a scissor and a masking tape.
I took the
1- Cadbury pouch in my hand
2- Turned it upside down
3- Subtly holed up the pouch’s base with scissor
4- Took out at least 5-8 chocolates from its bottom
5- Covered the base with the tape so that the chocolates remain in the packet and don’t drop down.
Now the pouch’s looking shiny and untouched but a bit lighter in weight — but who cares as the mission was successfully accomplished.
Right now I am indulging the chocolate experience and penning down my achievement — on the other hand my innocent bro, as expected — has already hidden the pouch and eating his few chocolates assuming that the pouch is safe from ‘Big Boss’
It’s widely perceived that with the passage of time we start getting mature avoid doing things that count “silly” but in my view how much older we grow such tiny but adventurous moments keep providing us a sense of joy. I love being what I am…
Pictorial version of Chocolate Robbery
Man behind ‘The Fall of Dhaka’
While going through the causes of the cessation of East Pakistan (excerpts from Hamood ur Rehman Commission report) and the development of post 1971 scenario I realized that Hitler was right when he said ‘the bigger the lie, more people will believe it’. Similar ‘bigger lies’ have been told by our previous governments (esp. PPP) since 1971.
On 16th December 2010, 39 years after the creation of Bangladesh, let us retrospect how our government in the past has told us a great lie about these political occurrences.
As per the details available in different form of electronic and print media, the Hamoodur Rehman Commission Report cites that incompetence, moral degeneration and political conspiracies were the major reasons for the 1971 debacle. It was maintained in the Report that the defeat suffered was not a result of military factors alone, but had been brought about as the cumulative result of political developments that took place between 1947 and 1971.
Looking at the other of the other side of the story I find that the Government then was actually the real culprit. It was Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto‘s party which got 82 of the 138 seats allocated to the four provinces in West Pakistan but neither of them were represented in East Pakistan. Setting aside the slogan raised by him “Idher ham udher tum”, he even threatened the members of the Assembly from West Pakistan that he would ‘break their legs’ if they attended its inaugural session in Dhaka, East Pakistan, and if they insisted on attending theymust buy a one-way ticket.
Such step motherly treatment further increased the grievances of the people of East Pakistan and a justified freedom movement emerged from their side, however at that time Pakistani Military had no other option but to supress the movement in order to save the territory of Pakistan while Bhutto on the other hand kept misguiding Yahya Khan that ended up on breaking the nation and massive bloodshed in the history of mankind.
Perceived as a ‘Hero’ amongst certain sections of Pakistanis for his political moves which on the contrary proved to be nonsensical and led the country into a chaotic humdrum.
His senseless steps of nationalization of the economy and confusing steps of implement Islamic socialism by declaring Friday as Public holiday were the worst steps taken by any ruler in the history of Pakistan. In order to appease religious groups he got Ahmedis declared Non Muslims that triggered an unending violent movement against a peaceful and progressive section of society. The brunts of this decision are still to be felt and fatally alienated the community in their own nation.
To remain in power Bhutto took decisions which caused irrevocable damage to the social and political structure of the country.
We also must not ignore the role of Jinnah in creating the language controversy in East Pakistan that Urdu was to be the common language for Pakistan. This proved highly controversial, since Urdu was a language that was only spoken in the West by Muhajirs and in the East by Biharis. The majority groups in West Pakistan spoke Punjabi, while the Bengali language was spoken by the vast majority of East Pakistanis. The Islamic state was not able to integrate and deal the prevailing ethnic and cultural differences which became the root cause of this debacle.
The language controversy eventually reached an extreme which lead East Pakistan to revolt while the other part of Pakistan remained calm even though Punjabi was spoken by the majority groups of West Pakistan.
Several civilians including students lost their lives in a police crackdown on 21 February 1952.The day is revered in Bangladesh and in West Bengal as the Language Martyrs’ Day.
In my opinion the policies Pakistani establishment set for East Pakistan were indeed biased and based on self interests, we never took the people of East Pakistan as our own since day one and as a result both the countries parted their ways. It’s time to stop selective blame game and hold responsible the politicians whose inability to lead this nation and structure it strong worked s a catalyst to the freedom movement in East Pakistan.
I wish neo-Bhuttos could now visit Bangladesh as they owe an apology to its people more than anybody else.
Karachi girls set a “Pathetic Record”
Nineteen school girls of Karachi have made a “history” and managed to register their names in the Guinness Book of World Record by accommodating themselves in a smart car.
The group led by Aimen Saleem Yousuf squeezed themselves into the car to break the earlier World record set by the Climb Fit Team of Australia when 18 students compressed into a standard Smart Car at the Warringah Mall, Sydney Australia on January 25, 2010.
My impression for Guinness Book of World Record was ruined when I watched those 19 “talented” girls trying to accommodate themselves in a small car climbing on each other in literally ‘weird positions’ for the sake of setting ‘world record’ surrounded by various media men who were happily taking photographs to print Pakistan’s competitive girls for next day’s newsprint.
I wonder what the hell that was but again its a matter of personal freedom and setting world records keeping the fact aside whether the circus they were indulging into was really productive.
To me, climbing over each other in a small car is not a big deal, I suggest Guinness Book people to just come out on the streets of Pakistan and see how the overloaded Public Buses in this part of the world carry more passengers than their seating capacity, its the record we set on daily basis.
If these girls really wanted to do something they should have come up with creatives ideas which could glorify nation in its true sense. Like Lahore Grammar School that made nation proud by winning NASA competition.
Likewise Last year Pakistan successfully managed to get into Guinness World Record by planting maximum number of mangrove sapling by breaking Indian record which they set up in Assam on 13th July 2009 by planting 447,874 trees in 24 hour.
The Sindh Card
After taking charge of the Government the first step Pakistan People’s party took was to unite Sindhi people on ethnic basis by playing a “Sindh Card”. It was an attempt to realize people of Sindh province that their Sindhi leaders have been assassinated in Punjab province and except the Bhutto’s league there is no one to speak on Sindh’s behalf.
As a result Pakistan People’s Party had successfully secured sympathy- vote from Sindh province (minus Karachi). Since that day the People’s party Government has decided to keep a grip on Sindh province through artificial means i.e not serving the people of this province but by keeping the element of Sindhi Nationalism alive in their hearts. They know the illiterate and poor population of interior Sindh can easily be exploited by the hands of Sindhi nationalist political parties.
To me Sindhi culture should be celebrated not by only by wearing an Ajrak and a Topi but through initiating literacy and women emancipation programs and operating against Dacoits in Kacha area of Sindh. I hope by reducing such stigmas associated with the land of Sindh, this province in true sense will be able to celebrate its cultural day. As of now Sindh is not known for Ajrak and Topi but by the social ills I have mentioned above.
In my opinion the people of Sindh should look for meaningful action, gestures beyond symbolism. They must demand concrete steps and clear policy for development of Sindh from the flag bearers of this province. They must ask themselves that despite the grip of Sindhi ruling party on this province why their province is still known as “Interior Sindh”.
People want development and progress. The current PPP regime has just given a “Topi” to Sindh in the name of culture day.
I wish poor Sindhis could unearth the conspiracy hatched by their very own leaders.
Evening Anxiety
At times I feel myself a victim of evening depression, I come across a mood disorder in which I experience depressive symptoms in the winter especially on silent nights. Though throughout the year I find evenings more depressing especially when Mullahs simultaneously give Azaan from mosques around and whenever the sun sets down, it’s like something left me and sadness has risen inside…
Right now its Sunday night and after a few minutes I will hit the bed, in between I got this interesting pic from my brother’s FB profile. I found it funny that has changed my mood (thanks to him). He perhaps took this picture in Multan.
When Culture collides with Religion
We always condemn western culture for being lewd and immoral for their openness towards sexuality for us which is impossible to think, we blame them for making women a sexual object for men, that is why they have high cases of rape and child molestation….
Let us take a break from this rhetoric saga and look closer, even our religious clerics have been in news quite often of –course not for sensationalizing fatwas but other wrong reasons. Amongst religious
conservatives in Pakistan especially the clerics and prayer leaders hailing from tribal areas often become a part of the news stories when they are found guilty of child molestation, victimizing young boys and girls who are apparently their students at home and Madarsa.
Although the religion strictly denounces it and mandates harsh punishment yet the trend of child molestation or pedophilia by religious clerics is increasing day by day giving Islam a bad name.
I fail to understand why these clerics who claim to be the true followers of Allah and Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) steep down to such activities and hamper the innocence of children.
So where the fault lies, of course not all religious clerics are pedophiles, the issue should be pondered over from larger perspective. In my humble opinion it’s the culture that needs to be answerable, we know the imposition of super conservative Islamic culture in certain parts of the country specially in tribal areas where unnecessary extreme restrictions on interacting with women leads to greater prevalence of the sexual crimes in the form of homosexuality as well as pedophilia.
Keeping the issue of pedophilia aside, homosexuality is common in tribal areas of Pakistan, in other words, sex between men can be seen as the flip side of the segregation of women due to tough religious obligations in Pashtoon culture, conservative Pakistani societies as well as Arab cultures. This is perhaps the reason we often read such accounts within tribal areas and by the religious clerics who live in the isolated culture and find easy access to young kids while teaching them privately.
Even the Child sex abuse allegations against Roman Catholic priests have caused anger in many countries across the globe. And the world’s renowned churches facing a series of pedophilia scandals, some observers, including senior figures from inside the Catholic, have begun to ask whether the tradition of celibacy in the priesthood has contributed to child abuse.
Since Islam does not have the concept of celibacy yet these incidences occur in our society. Do we think there is a need to ponder over the rigid culture of segregation?
In a country like Pakistan where religious intolerance is growing the society and other elements within needs to implement moderate culture and optimum interaction between men and women to avoid incidents of child molestation. The country never needed to practice Islam moderately as it needs now.
It’s high time to learn the difference between culture and religion and root out the ills of culture which are glued with the name of religion.
Sunday Evening
Poetry never fascinates me but I have just got a text message from one of my friends who has beautifully sketched the feelings of 9-5 brigade who feel the same sort of depression on Sunday evenings what I go through.
In Pakistan our offices were closed on 17th November on account of Eid ul Adha and going to resume tomorrow i.e Monday 22nd November.
Gham e Zindagi kaisay sunaaon
mera office khul raha hai kal
Main Khushi Kahan say Laaon
mera office khul raha hai kal
Tumhay yeh gila hai kay mizaaj kion hain barham
kaho kaisay muskuraaon mera office khul raha hai kal
Tumhay Eid ki khushi hai
Mujhay yaad hai wo
Lekin main kaisay bhool jaaon
Mera office khul raha hai kal
Beauty of Democracy
Pakistan’s democracy is playing a tool of Magical Wand for the ruling elites and Pakistan People’s Party . It seems in the name of democracy they have acquired a license to issue weirdest of ‘political Fatwas’ from the ‘house of gods’.
In a latest display of unprecedented stupidity The Sindh Assembly has passed a unanimous resolution against Transparency International for ranking Pakistan 34th in global corruption index. The resolution was tabled by Pakistan Peoples Party (PPP) MPA Sharjeel Memon. According to them Transparency International launched a propaganda against the government.
Earlier the Punjab Assembly passed a unanimous resolution condemning the role of media and alleged it of ‘irresponsible behavior’ amid the on-going fake degree controversy and this time the Sindh Assembly politicians never minded to make a fool out of themselves.
From Kamran Khan of Geo Tv to the common Pakistani who protests against price hikes on streets. All sort of criticisms are treated as “conspiracy” and attempts to derail democratic regime which is restored by the blood of Hazrat Benazir Bhutto Rehmat ullah Aleh and protected by one-time Laadla of General Zia ul Haq, Ameerul Momineen Hazrat Nawaz Shareef Rehmat ullah Aleh.
I now tend to agree with the statement that ‘democracy is the best revenge’ said by none other than Hazrat Bilawal Bhutto Zardari (a would be-Rehmatullah Aleh)
The Ultimate Politically Incorrect Quotes
They are supposed to be good orators but something which our politicians cannot avoid is Bloopers!!!!!
It’s only after they have said something in front of the media the politicians realize that how blundering it was. Often they end up saying something vague which can be easily sizzled by the media.
To their rescue comes the ‘official statement’ from their party blaming the media for misquoting their noble thoughts! Or may be sometimes for getting the party hands clean out of the matter, they shun taking responsibility for any such ‘misquotations’.
More often than not politicians intentionally issue stunning statements to stir controversy that ends up on compromises with the promise of not indulging in war on words anymore but the drama goes on. This tactic is also used to divert public attention from on going burning issue.
Mentioned are few of such ‘golden’ quotations from the elected leaders which are memorable for the people not because they were strong or power but also because they really sounded hilarious coming from their mouth. Living in an entertainment starved country like Pakistan — media gives maximum projection to their crazy statements and leaves nation hassled in serious or sometimes lighter vein until a new statement pops up.
In the light of Pakistan’s political history below I have tried to pen down few ‘notable’ quotes that have incited controversy in political arena and made Pakistanis stunned.
1. National Reconciliation Ordinance (NRO) is a medal and I regret over not to be listed in NRO.
Governor Punjab, Salman Taseer
2. Everyone whether he is a Baloch, Sindhi, Seraiki, Pashtun or Punjabi should be given an equal right to do corruption
Minister of State for Defence Production, Abdul Qayyum Jatoi
3. The other issues are all domestic and could be discussed later on … I can co-exist with a pig but not with a Punjabi.
Nawab Kher Bakhsh Marri, Baloch Nationalist Leader
4. Accords not holy Quran or Hadith
President of Pakistan, Asif Ali Zardari
5. I am not among those who offer sacrifice but I am among those who take sacrifices.
6. Gen Musharraf planned a bloodbath of innocent Muslims at the behest of others only to prolong his rule, but we in the PML-N opposed his policies and rejected dictation from abroad and if the Taliban are also fighting for the same cause then they should not carry out acts of terror in Punjab
Punjab Chief Minister, Shahbaz Sharif
7. Let’s persuade people to consume less sugar and then we will see where these hoarders sell their sugar.
Information Minister, Qamar Zaman Kaira
8. Dr Babar Awan is ‘Abu Jahl’ of lawyers’ fraternity
Punjab Law Minister, Rana Sanaullah
9. Governor Punjab’s status no better than ‘toilet paper’
Punjab Law Minister, Rana Sanaullah
10. I’m a badmash and know well how to deal with this lot.
Sindh Home Minister, Zulfiqar Mirza
11. You must understand the environment in Pakistan. This has become a moneymaking concern. A lot of people say if you want to go abroad and get a visa for Canada or citizenship and be a millionaire, get yourself raped.
Former President General Pervez Musharraf
12. Our Hero Is Raja Dahir Not Muhammad Bin Qasim
ANP representative, Senator Haji Adeel
13. Degree is a degree whether original or fake
Chief Minister Balochistan, Nawab, Muhammad Aslam Raisani
14. I don’t say that there is no corruption in my ministry, but the question is where it is not.
Ghulam Ahmad Bilour, Federal Minister Railways
15. These (Burying women alive) are centuries-old traditions, and I will continue to defend them.
Federal Minister for Postal Services, Israr Ullah Zehri
16. We were ready to break Pakistan and were much more determined to chant slogan of ‘Pakistan Na Khapay’ – No need of Pakistan.
Sindh Home Minister, Zulfiqar Mirza
17. The division of the subcontinent was the biggest blunder in the history of mankind. It was not the division of land; it was the division of blood.
Muttahida Qaumi Movement Leader, Altaf Hussain
18. I apologies to the departed soul of Sikh ruler (Ranjit Singh) for frequently quoting his name in meetings for wrong reasons. I was wrong. Ranjit (Singh) was a great administrator of Punjab.
Leader of Opposition, Chaudhry Nisar Ali Khan
19. Iftekhar Chaudhry is the scum of the earth – a third-rate man – a corrupt man.
Former President General Pervez Musharraf
20. Even more gorgeous than I had expected, now I know why the whole of America is crazy about you. If he’s (cameraman) insisting, I might hug you.
President of Pakistan, Asif Ali Zardari
21. Punjab law minister Rana Sanaullah is a ‘manjan seller’
Central Secretary for Information of Pakistan Peoples Party, Fauzia Wahab
22. Even if contract is given to America it will also be unable to bring peace
Sindh Home Minister, Zulfiqar Mirza
23. His (Altaf Hussain’s) arrest seems only weeks away, and investigations being conducted by Scotland Yard and police are in their final stages.
Chairman, Pakistan Tehreek e Insaaf , Imran Khan
24. Look, you will soon see Shaukat Aziz ditching Gen Musharraf and joining the political leadership of the opposition parties.
25. I am not afraid of jail’s mosquitoes
President of Pakistan, Asif Ali Zardari
26. Munawar Gill committed adultery with consent, can’t take action.
Punjab Law Minister, Rana Sanaullah
27. Kamran Khan, the famous Geo TV anchorperson, presented 560 news stories solely on President Asif Zardari, mainly to target him. Ansar Abbasi is also working on the same agenda, i.e. to weaken democracy in Pakistan. Both the senior journalists are ‘Indian agents’.
Senior Minister of Punjab Assembly, Raja Riaz
28. I launched my Facebook page eight months ago; today I have more than 315,000 fans.
Former President of Pakistan, Pervez Musharraf
29. All out efforts are being made to overcome the energy crisis and the load-shedding would end by December 2009.
Minister for Water and Power Raja Pervez Ashraf
30. Nawaz League is the enemy of Pakhtuns and still following the policies of Ranjeet Singh
ANP Provincial President Afrasiab Khattak
31. No Muslim is involved in suicidal attacks in Pakistan, and rather Blackwater (Xe) – a US private contractor – and Indian agents are involved in these incidents.
Ameer, Jamaat e Islamic, Syed Munawar Hasan
32. The MQM will openly support the patriotic generals if they take any martial law-type action against corrupt politicians and feudal lords.
Muttahida Qaumi Movement chief Altaf Hussain
33. Tehrik-e-Insaf will back military rule in the country for the sake of stability.
Chairman Pakistan Tehrik-e-Insaf, Imran Khan
34. My own brother approached me and said lala (brother), ‘Can I also join your party?’ I told him to run away … you are a known gambler.
Dr. Sher Afgan Niazi, Member of All Pakistan Muslim Leagues
35. I have sent Gilani to the PPP and I will call him back to the PML, when he becomes tired.
36. The PML-N has appointed Punjab Law Minister Rana Sanaullah as a “loudspeaker”
Governor Punjab, Salman Taseer
37. How a person, who used to sell tickets at Bambino cinema in Karachi, reached the Surrey Palace and became richer than Queen Elizabeth before his ascendancy to the presidency? It is a million-dollar question that only the PPP top leader has to answer.
Spokesman Pakistan Muslim League N, Siddiqul Farooq
38. If Musharraf is thinking he can stage a comeback it’s only because how things are now, his era looks relatively better
Chairman Pakistan Tehreek e Insaaf, Imran Khan
39. Yesterday, when I asked Khwaja Imran Nazir for a lift, he was listening to Munni Badnam, an Indian song, in his car.
MPA Punjab Assembly, Hassan Murtaza
40. Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz will take out a ‘long march’ if the decision (of bringing in NAB chairman) is not retracted.
Punjab Chief Minister Mian Shahbaz Sharif
41. I have been able to take the nod of one bride (ANP) and now I am going to take the nod of another (MQM)
Sindh Home Minister Zulfikar Mirza
42. If it is possible for Punjab’s leaders, they can unite their province with Indian Punjab
Aisha gets her new nose
Brave: Aisha, 19, pictured wearing a type of prosthetic nose often used by film actors. Her nose and ears were hacked off by brutal in-laws after she was promised in marriage aged 12
The 19 year old girl, shocked the world when she appeared on the cover page of Time Magazine to lift the veil on the plight of many women in Afghanistan. We all know that Afghanistan and in some cases Pakistan becomes horrible when it comes to emancipate their women.
Muslim countries especially in Pakistan women might not get publically tortured to such a horrible extent but the amount of stress a woman of land of pure gets in terms of psychological tortures which lead to destruction of their the self-image forcing them to adopt stress positions .
Musharraf Reloaded
In his recent candid public appearance Musharraf fired the first round of verbal bullets on the gang of criticizers who left no chance of back lashing his name while he maintained distance from the public and media. His first shot came for Dr. AQ Khan who was victimized being called “characterless”, while he titled Nawaz Shareef as “Brainless” and revealed that it was actually Chaudries because of whom NRO was introduced but the heated words did not come to a hold here.
It seems Musharraf has decided to go one on one with certain politicians and analysts who have been point scoring on his name and portraying him as a root cause of prevailing and past crises. I am not sure whether this is the right time to browbeat opponents but I believe he’s justified to respond them in ‘Awami style’.
The first terminology he used was “spent cartridges”(Chalay huey Kaartoos) directed for those good- for- nothing retired Generals who teamed up to have him held accountable for actions, which include alleged abrogation of the Constitution and Kargil debacle. The ex Generals sitting idle at home had apparently nothing to do in their lives so they took Musharaf’s activities as an opportunity that could help them come on TV and might allow little fame which they never had a chance to enjoy.
The flow of the strategy was devised during the Judicial crisis in Pakistan when every time comparatively an aged General would appear on TV and spew nonsense against Musharraf but on the contrary they had to witness guard of honor to Musharraf and no treason charges so far which further added insult to their injuries, then emerges another character Dr. A.Q Khan, the same Pakistani rogue scientist who had admitted to transferring technology and information to Iran and North Korea and confessed on national television to running a proliferation network.
Right after Musharraf’s resignation, Mr. Khan without worrying about his self esteem and the position he held joined the bandwagon of politicians and in a typical colloquial style wrote an article in Jang Newspaper where he called Musharraf despicable, traitorous foreign agent donned the costume of Presidency who failed in his dirty deeds, he further accused him of being the self-styled Commando who cannot even set his foot on the street of this country because ‘the public’ will tear him into tiny pieces and feed to the scavengers.
These low levels of statement’s made against Musharraf, forced him to retaliate and call Dr. Khan a “characterless” for obvious reasons.
On the other hand another character Mir Zafarullah Jamali , who in 1970s was a minister for the Pakistan Peoples Party, served as a minister in Balochistan . In the 1980s worked in the government of General Muhammad Zia-ul-Haq as a minister of various departments, in the 1990s became an important member of the Pakistan Muslim League (N) however after the removal of Nawaz Sharif, Mr. Jamali joined the PML-Q and now taking a U turn he blamed Musharraf for preparing to send Pakistani troops in Iraq Meanwhile, Chaudhry Shujaat Hussain in his interview got the facts straight and told
media that that when he was Prime Minister for a brief period, he had in fact refused to send troops to Iraq. Now it becomes easier for us to figure out the reality.
Similarly, the PML N, who is endemic to drag Musharraf in every issue and holding him responsible for every catastrophe, be it Aafia Siddiqui case, Bugtis murder or even Nawaz Shareef’s hair loss, but when Musharraf responds — the “renowned Shareefs” are reminding him of his etiquettes.
Now the Musharraf has started making presence in media which is obviously a tough task to handle for Shareef brothers who shamelessly signed agreements in December 2000 with him and flew to Saudi Arabia with their families and servants leaving behind their hapless party men.
Musharraf was Indeed a dictator but he had few feathers in his cap. In some cases, the dictator has achieved more. The achievements of Pervez Musharraf become evident when compared with that of the present government.
When being dictator he could introduce democratic norms like local Government or media freedom etc, just imagine what wonders he can perform as a democratic leader.
Now the dictator has turned into a democrat, the democracy obsessed nation should not only welcome him but appreciate his AWAMI style of politics as well.
XIX Commonwealth Games 2010 Delhi
XIX Common Wealth Games in Delhi is perhaps the most criticized sporting event of the decade due to the management as well as infrastructural flaws.
As soon as the event kicked off the host city began 
confronting various problems highlighted by foreign media and the countries who were against to hold CWG in India however South Asia’s emerging power within the limitations of its financial resources, workforce skills, pressing competing demands and probable corruption, has fully utilized its potential and made her dream come true.
Now the CWG games despite uncalled for criticism are progressing with full pace and world’s renowned athletes are busy securing their medals.
It is is indeed a setback for those miscreants who are hell bent on finding faults in the ongoing event, India, a developing country that has snatched such a wide scale multi-sport event from the developed world and so far successfully leading it deserves appreciation for exhibiting its potential.
Being a Pakistani this event makes me realize where Pakistan actually stands.
We have no right to criticize India that has actually glorified our continent. We Pakistanis should rather worry whether we will ever be able to convince International community for holding even a single cricket match on our “Jihadi Sarzameen”.
Well done India!
Echoes of Revolution
“Revolution” was not the talk of the town until Pakistan experienced the worst form governance in its history. The deadly floods couldn’t discipline Pakistan’s notorious ministers to focus on public service. The besieged government of Benazir’s husband is unable to deal with the conflicts both man made and natural, being handled by the “Information Ministry”, which has left them assailed by the echoes of revolution arising from Pakistan’s political sphere.
Altaf Hussain, from the MQM was the first who tested the waters by articulating the suspicion of Pakistanis when he accused feudal of deliberately diverting waters to the neighbouring villages to save their crops, live stocks and personal properties. The reaction was mixed from political parties but massive support of public to the idea of ‘change’ raised the eye brows of Pakistani Think-tank and Media.
The blunt yet pragmatic demand from Altaf Hussain is a further extension of his party’s political manifesto in which he’s critical about the disguised dictatorship working under the banner of democracy, this time he wants an action from Army, the real power base of Pakistan having a strong contribution in policy making. The call for Army has come from him as a response to betrayal from elected feudal representatives against catastrophe which Altaf has been pointing out since the birth of MQM.
Conventional political parties haunted by feudal lords and corrupt politicians are as usual criticizing Altaf’s statement by calling it an attempt to derail the ‘democratic’ set up. Instead of discussing the lead given by the MQM leader and debating the technicalities of his viewpoint for finding a solution the politicians are hell-bent on exploiting a rare opportunity of fixing Pakistan’s corrupted political setup.
Altaf’s call for revolution to rescue Pakistan and its people from the clutches of feudal lords, corrupt politicians and plunderers of national wealth is not an invite to the military to take over but is very much inline with the Constitution. The Supreme Court could invoke Article 190 and ask for aid from Army when the Executive refuses to take action on its verdict. It seems that there is no other way to get rid of this 63 year old elected despondency as the rotation of same families will continue and the public will keep bearing the same democratic dictators and their breed through out their life.
As far as criticism on Altaf Hussain’s statement is concerned, I believe it’s high time the politicians and the public keep the personal grudges aside and look for the real issues being highlighted by him. Living abroad in an ordinary house cum office and managing the party successfully is an art itself. We have witnessed various political parties being narrowed to their respective territories in Pakistan in the absence of their leaders.
Pakistanis have recently witnessed Army’s role as protectors of their lives from terrorists and natural calamities although approved by the nation at large, it received recognition by outspoken Altaf Hussain, who has urged them to clean the society from elected despondency. MQM has floated an idea for building the effective and inclusive government which Pakistan deserves. It is now up to us as a Nation, whether to bring about change or opt to worship Bhuttos, Pagaras, Makhdooms and Shareefs.
An op ed in Tribune Blogs
